Expensive place

When I got home from work last night,
my wife demanded that I take her out
to an expensive place..

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So I took her to a petrol station!



i

Hello guests!Good morning from the Philippines!

Hello!Hello!

Chocolates can make your feet small?

(Foreword: The photo and words on this post are all from FFO yahoo group.This does not aim to make fun of these sexy ladies in the picture below... for in fairness to them,being sexy does not necessarily mean that they need to have small waists or curvaceous bodies, for they too, are beautiful in their own rights.)

A forwarded e-mail:

ATTENTION !!!

Warning About Chocolate

Do you eat chocolate?!

We were raised on chocolate as kids
and even into adulthood.

I will never eat it again. I hope you will
throw yours away whenever you get
given any from now on. It seems as though
nothing is safe to eat anymore.

This is what happens when you eat
chocolate!This is a warning, send this
to everyone you care about.
It could happen to you.......or them.

Chocolate will make your feet small!!

Warn everyone !!

Hehehehehe!

Drunk Baby

Heavy?

Wow!So heavy!Can't you see?

A Family Problem

Two men, one American and an Indian
were sitting in a bar drinking shot after
shot.

The Indian man said to the American,
"You know my parents are forcing me
to get married to this so called homely
girl from a village whom I haven't
even met once.We call this arranged
marriage.I don't want to marry a
woman whom I don't love...I
told them that openly and now
have a hell lot of family problems."

The American said, "Talking about
love marriages... I'll tell you my story.


I married a widow whom I deeply loved
and dated for 3 years."After a couple of
years, my father fell in love with my
step-daughter and so my father
became my son-in-law and I
became my father's father-in-law.

My daughter is my mother and
my wife my grandmother.

More problems occurred when I
had a son. My son is my father's
brother and so he my uncle.
Situations turned worse when
my father had a son.

Now my father's son i.e.
my brother is my grandson.

Ultimately, I have become my
own grand father and I am my
own grandson.

And you say you have family
problems..Gimme a break!!!!"

A Little Girl And Her Dead Goldlfish...

(Parental Guidance: Please tell your child that the word "fucken" is not to be used in formal and respectable conversations.)

How To Reply If Your Job Application Is Rejected?

Job rejected?

Next time your application for a job is rejected...
Here is how one rejected job applicant replied
through e-mail:


Dear [Interviewer' s Name ]:

Thank you for your letter of [Date of Interview ].

After careful consideration I regret to inform you
that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer
me employment with your firm. This year I have
had been particularly fortunate in receiving an
unusually large number of rejection letters.
With such a varied and promising field of
candidates it is impossible for me to accept
all refusals.

Despite [ Firm's Name ]'s outstanding
qualifications and previous experience
in rejecting applicants, I find that your
rejection does not meet with my needs
at this time. Therefore, I will initiate
employment with your firm immediately
following graduation.

I look forward to seeing you then.


Best of luck in rejecting future candidates.


Sincerely ,
[Your Name ]

The Gift

Rick was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary.

His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow
morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that
goes from 0 to 200 in less than 6 seconds AND IT
BETTER BE THERE!! "

She was expecting a brand new car.

The next morning Rick got up early and left for work.
When his wife woke up she looked out the window
and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in
the middle of the driveway .

Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to
the driveway, and brought the box back in the
house. She opened it and found a brand new
bathroom scale!

Rick has been missing since Friday .
Please pray for him ..